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Pokemon Mercury

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Posted

As the pigtailed girl walked away, all Rose chould think about was how rudely she has been treated. "Its not my fualt the public cumputer will only allow you to check you to check your mail and pokemon boxes," she said in quite seething rage, "stupid hacker prevention laws." As she saw the rude Unova girl enter the musical hall with a strange odd creature that reminded her of a Mereep for some reason, she look at her pokeball and sihed "Meloia could easily win that contest if I knew her moves." Then in a small fit of rage said,"when is that proffessor girl gonna finish upgrading my pokedex I'm tired of not knowing."

"Miss Rosabell Thorn your're contest pass is ready" announced the intercom.

"Well, I guess I can deal with winnning the dance contest...for now at least," Rose said then smiled while looking at her two prize pokemon, " Gardivor, Gallade, time to show them that slow dance you two have been working on and win this." She quickly picked up her pass and went to the registraition booth when she heard a ruckus in the music hall. Rose smiled at the thought of that rude girl from earlier getting a shock to the head or something. After enjoying that thought for a moment she quickly signed up for the dance contest. Or at least she would have if it wasn't already full. Rose was getting really railed up when she notice a dead odd-looking pokemon on the ground.Another Unova trainer passed her with a confused look.

"What is this place" He said to the desk lady. Which Rose thought was odd thing to ask since everyone knew.

"We dare not speak it's name" the desk lady replied with an annoyed tone.

Rose thought this guy was either extremly stupid or extremly lost so she answered him with a smile, "it's the main contest lobby,silly."

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Posted

"I didn't speak to you, cretin. How dare you speak to me, don't you know I'm kind of a big deal?" Alex said, standing over Rose like some massive building, and there are clouds above it moving away from you and it looks like it's falling on you. Similar in that IT IS PRETTY puppyING INTIMIDATING.

"No, forgive my ignorance"

Alex turned away from the girl, he didn't need to be here. And besides, his senses were tingling and he could tell that there was danger here.

AND HE COULDN'T HAVE BEEN MORE RIGHT

AS USUAL

A really huge massive Groudon crashed up from underground and really ruined the floor

"Whoooa" was the general opinion on this most crazy of events

The Groudon turned to Alex and then it said "Groudon" and then gave the person at the desk his insurance details and dove back into the floor

12 people died that day.

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Posted

Name: Bulbasaur

Region: Kanto

Pokemon: n/a

Looks: Like a Bulbasaur

Age: 8

History: Born and raised in the wild, he killed a trainer with his bare vines when it tried to catch him.

Specializing in: Not giving a shit, giving a shit where not giving a shit is ideal, giving multiple shits wherein one shit would suffice, Quick draws with his Colt .45

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Posted

Note: Someone will need to write another part sooo I can get ideas for another stupid crap Pigtails segment :>

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The wild bulbasaur staggered out into the middle of the city. It was high noon. There wasn't a cloud in sight; The sky was naked, it's sun full exposed for all of the earth to jack off to. Normally children would be swarming around onto the dirt roads eagerly catch a wild pokemon silly enough to meander out of the tall grass. Normally, wild pokemon were silly. This Bulbasaur was not silly, however, and his reputation went out of it's way to precede him, and then some, for being as such. The dried blood on his bulb helped.

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Jack walked into the hall and talked to the person at the front desk.

"Where is the door to the stands?" he asked.

"On the left next to the dead Yotterie." She replied.

He walked in and situated himself in the front row. He was the first one there. He wanted to see this contest to scout talent for his adventure. The Unova region would come first, then Sinnoh, Hoenn, Johto, and Kanto. Finally, the would take on Kylla, the newest region to be found by the national Pokebase located in Kanto. If anyone knew who would join him it would be Uxie, the Legendary Pokemon of knowledge.

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"Hyah!" Jared says as he jumps from a high cliff with his Zangoose next to him. He looks back up, noticing his bag fell off at the top of the cliff when jumping. A man in black picks it up and runs.

"Hey, get back here!" he yells, shaking his fist, worrying about Wartortle and Pikachu. He immediately gets on top of Zangoose.

"That way, Zangoose!" Jared points a way back up.

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As the boy walked away, Rose stood there a bit stunned at what he just said. "I..." she stearted to say she was sorry if she somehow offended him but her bad day caused her anger meter to explode and she instead yelled, "ARE ALL UNOVA TRAINERS RUDE AND UNSOCIALIBLE. I ASK FOR A LITTLE HELP AND I GET TREATED LIKE A CAVE MAN, AND WHEN I TRIED TO HELP ONE AND GET A RUDE REPLY. AND WHAT WAS THAT WAS HE TRYING TO INTIMIDATE ME, HAH I CLIMBED HILLS MORE INTIMIDATING THEM HIM!" Before Rose could go on a cursing spree, she noticed the girl from before walking out of the lobby and decided to catch up to the girl and give her a piece of her mind. Roses rage made her completely not notice the Groudon event.

When she finally cought up with the girl she grabed her shirt to get her attention again. But before she could say a word her PokeNav ranged.

"Hello this is Rosabell and may I ask you this is," Rose answered completely unaware that she is still holding the girl's shirt.

"Um, hello I-um ...am calling about the Pokedex you asked us to update," said the caller.

"Oh, hi Professor, so it finish already" said Rose slightly relieving her grip on the girl, "that was quick-"

" We're so sorry Miss Rose" the Professor said in a distresses voice.

"What happen"Rose tightens her grip.

"Well, uh, one of our interns accidently... broke it," the Proffessor said; struggling to get her word out, "were very sorry and we promise to make you a new one- free of charge of course"

"How long will it take," Rose said trying desperately to keep her absolute rage from breaking her PokeNav and distroying everything around her which may or may not include the forgotten girl she is still holld on too.

"Oh, about a weak," the Professor said, relief that Rose did not seem mad at the iccident she blamed the intern for.

*Click* Rose turn off her PokeNav, truly and utterly, completely pissed off.

"I HATE Unova" she whispered to herself and realized she was still holding on to the girl. Thinking she could mybe vent some of that rage and teach someone the consequences of being rude.

With her kindest voice possible and a smile Rose asked the girl, "sorry about that, so~ you wanna battle?"

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Bulbasaur stopped. Someone, somewhere nearby was doing something stupid. This was a modern rare occurrence. Most of the town should know by now not to be stupid around him. Most of them know just to get out of his sight, and stay there. He stood and surveyed the area, unnervingly quiet for somewhere so inhabited.

Suddenly, an idiot rode by on a Zangoose. Bulbasaur was thrown into a migraine. His head throbbed and pulsed and shook. Nausea greeted him in the usual style. In his rage, or what may have been submission, he sent his trembling vine slithering into his bulb, unblinking, unwavering eyes locked on the rodent. Rushing himself he pulled his shaking vine out, gripping his slugger in his hand. The Zangoose changed direction and started running towards the bulbasaur, rider and steed oblivious. Bulbasaur churned and vomited. His heart pounded. As quickly as his now sickly body would let him, he put a bullet between the eyes of the zangoose.

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(Could you please explain the bullet?)

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(It Shot your Zangoose in the head)

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(Seriously? We just started.)

"Gyah!" Zangoose yells, falling to the ground, Jared falling after. He gets up.

"Zangoose!" Jared yells. He glares a the Bulbasaur, and he lunges at it, punching at crushing it. Throwing it out of the way, he goes back to Zangoose.

"Zangoose! There's no way i can transport you, that man took my Pokeballs!" Jared says, trying to move him.

"Help! Someonoe help!" Jared yells, lips quivering.

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After many a hour of being chased by angry protestors and street fighters, outraged at how awful Floofypants the Erufuun was designed and her piss-poor attempt at dancing the square tango, Penny Pigtails had found herself in Sanyou City, bleeding sweat from every skin pore on her extremely, deadly, Vitamin D-less, porcelain, mannequin and cottony skin. She was noticeably Erufuun-less now, it's discarded corpse left behind in Karakusa Town. That beehive was not properly trained, Pigtails thought as she lay in a fountain frothing.

"Well, at least that Yorterrie corpse can be of some use, it can be part of my new puppet program predominant prudes!" Pigtails squealed like a leaning jowler, sweat cascading out of her pigtails and oral cavity.

Suddenly realizing that what she wanted was a Makin' Bacon Pass the Spoinks move, she cawed and sweated even more, until the fountain was a nice pastely paste colour.

But then! She remembered her other pokemans. Geekijika the faun with a flower in merryweather (lol maleficent) and Patrick Dempsey the Bachuru were sent out from their prisons, fresh from an omegle trek in Dubai. Pigtails hooted like the hootiest hooters Hoothoot thing you could gun down from 500 light years away just like Duck Hunt, which is a very sad game and the Yorterrie bastard dog was a dickhole :C and started to dress up her latest victims of fashion gone satan.

Soon Geekijika was wearing a magenta scarf with harry potter lightning bolt scar shaped glasses and Patrick Dempsey had a mereslut furcoat on him. Pigtails drunkenly sweated her love for her newest deathtraps as she glomped them against her pettanko chesticles, resulting in more accidents and flowery recaps.

But then some shit involving a zangoose happened near her and her chesticles fell off in shock and lust at this unremarkable event.

And then Pigtails danced a foxtrot into the Sanyou City Musical Hall that didn't really exist and dropped her balls as a result of running into a Pidove furry cosplayer.

CLIFFHANGERS

  • will Pigtails discover the identity of Pidove furryman
  • will I write a Musical scene
  • will I write something that has a reading age higher than 5
  • will Pigtails stop being such an insane freak

END OF CHAPTER btw

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Alex heard the cry of a 12 year old voice, longing for his Zangoose

"What is wrong with you" Alex said to the boy, who was obviously far inferior to Alex

"My Zangoose got a bullet in the head, that isn't even a Pokemon move!" Said 1

"I see. There is a cure for this." Alex was happy to tell 1

":D?" said 1

"I must avenge it's death. Pokemon tears must be supplied." Alex took out his Pokeballs and let out his Linoone (Big Man), Buizel (Carlos) and Yorterrie (Clover). "Big Man. I trained you where I caught you, do you know how much of your family you killed with your own hands during those hours of training

";^;" said Big Man

"Carlos, you're adopted"

"D':" said Carlos

"Clover, you are not a human being like me, because if you were a human being you would be a shit one and therefore you are a dog"

">>>>>>>,:" said Clover

"Thank you sir!!" said 1

"Do not flatter me, it makes me uncomfortable. Now I must avenge your Zangoose to bring it back to life."

The Bulbasaur knew that it's time had come. It looked at Alex. And Alex looked at it. And it knew it was the end.

The Bulbasaur rasied his gun, but Alex disarmed/vined him and shot it in the head.

Delicious salad was had by all.

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"Zangoose! You're better!" Jared says petting and hugging it.

"Thanks Alex." Jared says, looking at the dead Bulbasaur.

"Well, i've got to go save my other Pokemon. Come along if you like." Jared says, climbing on Zangoose and riding back up the cliff.

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