Downsizing Game

135 posts in this topic

Posted

Sorry I haven't been on. All people: Please send in your votes.

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Posted

Vote for me to win

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Posted

So I kinda had a lot of stuff to deal with in the past few days, sorry for not posting in this round :<

 

Insert joke about how I don't do homework hahahahaha what am i even doing

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Posted

The votes are in! What a laugh!

 

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BWAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!

 

What a nice voting round we had. See you in last place Necropolis! Better get sweet talking. Remember that you're allowed to talk to people outside of the thread about the game as much as you want. No limits there.

 

 

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Good luck ladies and laddies.

emsomniac and pheonix561 like this

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Posted

teto im just

those pictures just like

omg im just laughing i dont even

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Posted

Wow... what a meteoric plunge

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Posted

Round 3

 

zVd4y6G.png

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temptation

Temptation is the desire to perform an action that one may enjoy immediately or in the short term but will probably later regret for various reasons: legal, social, psychological (including feeling guilt), health-related, economic, etc. In the context of religion, temptation is the inclination to sin.

 

Want to lie in a bit longer even though you should get up and go to class?

Want to stay up late at night just for the momentary warmth of cyber company?

You get what I mean? Things that get in the way of what you need to do. What do you need to do, and why haven't you done those things yet? What are the temptations keeping you from furthering your personal growth? How are you combating your temptation? Are you even trying? Why? Why not?


Discuss your temptations and guilt, and all anxieties related to these things.
 
It's a broader, deeper topic than homework or forum moderation. I hope you can follow it.
 
 
Here's the scoreboard development over the first two days. You could go back and do the math yourself to get this info, so there's no harm in giving you this. So you know what you're looking at, 2jo4 got 4 votes in the first round of voting, and then 7 in the second, giving her 11 votes overall. Same layout for the rest.

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I suppose the train of thought that spelled Necropolis's doom was "He's high up, so I be giving him more votes and risk making him win by an even larger margin." And so, nobody put their votes on him.

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Posted

I don't have much of anything to say on this topic. I'm non-religious, so I can't cover that front. I don't really have anything I need to do right now, either, so I'm not tempted to avoid anything in favor of anything else. A lot of stuff I want to do won't have any real regret later on, to an extent.

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Posted

What do you think about lizards then?

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Posted

You're a lizard, Larry!

I am tempted by everything I surround myself in.

I am also in a long, ongoing battle with the temptation to die. This funeral boat doesn't help me much. Teto, don't die.

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Posted

I don't really have anything I need to do right now, either, so I'm not tempted to avoid anything in favor of anything else. A lot of stuff I want to do won't have any real regret later on, to an extent.

savor this feeling.

 

ill skip the paragraphs that ive vomited up in skype chats and other threads, and even just earlier in here.

 

things i need to do:

homework

5 projects (one per class <3)

email strangers for interviews (i need a cardiac doctor :| they are very dodgy about their emails and answering people)

find a job (after graduation)

lease an apartment for the summer

enroll in summer school

(next week) enroll in classes for fall

 

things i want to do/need to do:

play Ib, DeSu2 (again), Yume Nikki, KI:U, KI1&2, Fire Emblem, Tales of Graces (as many times as i can)

clean chapter whateveritwas for nice pitching

catch up on all my manga

catch up on my missed/partially watched anime. this means psypass, little busters, and P4tA

rewatch bakemonogatari

go back to drawing project M

draw some dragon nest misadventures (step 1: figure out how to not make everyone look like crap, but still kainda in the style)

 

things i want to do but physically cant:

give my internet friends hugs

sleep all day

never sleep without feeling tired

play my undubbed P4 rom (laptop was too close to overheating last time i tried, and that was with a tiny desk fan and cooling pad)

play the everliving hell out of dragon nest.

get decent enough at P4A to beat t1g (my copy is at home, and anyway, i cant take the 360, and even if i could, i dont have the time)

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Posted (edited)

I am also in a long, ongoing battle with the temptation to die. This funeral boat doesn't help me much. Teto, don't die.

 

Why isn't there a dislike button.

 

Sayuuuu I luurve you dun be sads pls

 

I guess my biggest temptation is the beckoning call of being lazy, apathetic, and depressed. Highschool for me was like an endless pit of apathy, because I kept telling myself I would probably just end up committing suicide, and that made me not really put value on anything I was doing. I pretty much hit rock bottom sophomore year, I was so depressed that I'm pretty sure I had what I would now describe as mild psychosis. I started seeing things, like blood dripping down walls, or brief flashes of corpses everywhere when I was walking through crowds of people at school, and even started self-harming. I brought myself out of it after a while, mostly through comparison to some friends I had that were even worse. Like this one guy I knew (who was a little odd to begin with, I'm almost certain he had Antisocial Personality Disorder, and I have plenty of other stories of him) slit his wrists and painted a mural on his bedroom wall in his own blood, and then showed us pictures and the huge scabbed over cuts on his arms. And then when my parents found out that I'd been cutting (this was like 6 months afterward, and the whole rock bottom phase didn't last for more than 3 or 4 months) I got sent to a counseling program and everyone there was either covered in scars, incredibly aggressive all the time, or a nervous wreck. The only thing I could think the whole time was that I really didn't have it nearly as bad as them, and that I was honestly lucky to be where I was. I think the final straw was when my girlfriend in junior year broke up with me because she felt guilt-tripped by her abusive, suicidal, schizophrenic ex boyfriend. She got back with him for a week, and all her friends ostracized her because he was a massive jerk (and they were kinda too) so she broke up with him, and then tried to kill herself. I spent about 3-4 hours at like 1 am trying to talk her out of it, probably the most stressful moment in my life. 

 

So after having my head thoroughly puppyed by years of this kind of shit, I basically shut myself off from negative people for 6 months, and kinda had a little journey to find my identity. I discovered that I was (at least) bisexual when I developed a crush on a boy in my art class, and I kinda started to just open my mind up and throw out any preconceived notions I had of who I was. I started to remember a bunch of things I had repressed from my childhood - mostly feelings about my gender. When I was probably 9 or 10 (I had insomnia problems even then) I would always pass the hours lying in my bed before sleep by coming up with a little world in my head, of inventions and ideas and stuff that I wanted to make. I remembered that for years, I had had this recurring dream about a metal-detector type thing that I had built that would spontaneously swap my gender whenever I walked through it - and then I would have the rest of the dream as a girl, doing whatever the dream had me doing. It was like this little gateway to happiness, kinda sappy and weird, but i was a little kid, an only child, and that was just the kind of thing I did to entertain myself. Anyway, after remembering all this stuff, it really didn't take long for me come out to myself. Repressed memories are weird like that. You just remember them, and *poof*, epiphany.

 

After I came out to myself and started taking steps to transition and accept myself my depression got 100 times better, and honestly, apart from school-related stress, this is one of the happiest times in my life.

 

So anyway I know that story kinda took a weird turn away from the topic but I just needed to write it all down I guess.

 

I'm sure there's actually some stuff in there that I've never told anyone before, but whatever, its no big deal. Its weird, but after a certain point in transition I kinda just started to disassociate from my previous identity and memories, and I don't really care if people know about stuff that happened to old me. Like I still remember, but its as if they're someone else's memories implanted into my head.

 

Either that or I'm actually a clone.

Edited by emsomniac (see edit history)
Cascade and Teto like this

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Posted (edited)

Sayuuuu I luurve you dun be sads pls

 

The weird part is that it's not even distress triggered. Or maybe it is in a different sense? I don't know I just feel like my purpose in life is done. Done. Just. That's it. o_o

Maybe the weird purpose-less-ness is distressing? I don't even know anymore. It's like this thought in the back of my head, nipping at my thoughts. The method changes on my mood too. It goes from wishing that I'd fall asleep and not wake up ever again to promising myself that if I had to die, I would jump off a tall thing because hospital bills are a bitch. e-e

e-e

Funeral boat is still my favorite choice so far.

There's also the persistent temptation to immerse myself in some video game. I once stopped playing minecraft and wondered why everything wasn't cubular. A very serious passing thought that I had to slap myself about. 

And then there're the dreams. The nice comforting dreams where I'm not /here/ but somewhere else and there're these people there. Sometimes they're people I know like you guys and sometimes they're people that are made probably from a mishmash of real life and media. Then there's that one person who never looks the same but is definitely the same person. Strongest. Temptation. To sleep. Right there. Every time that person's in the dream, it's an incredibly happy and super awesome dream. So much so that I despair upon waking up.

And then it's all suppressed.

Everything.

And that's all.

Either that or I'm actually a clone.

 

3D robot.

 Tales of Graces (as many times as i can)

Roommate says you're not allowed to come over because:

 

"he came over for Graces when we had it but when we stopped having it he stopped coming over as much so he's a jerk :(((((((((((((((((((("

 

you've offended your second future wife. She sad at you.

Edited by 2jo4 (see edit history)

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Posted (edited)

The weird part is that it's not even distress triggered. Or maybe it is in a different sense? I don't know I just feel like my purpose in life is done. Done. Just. That's it. o_o

 

No, I totally understand what you mean. Like you don't really feel suicidal but you'd just kinda rather sleep and never wake up because you just don't have the energy to deal with it all anymore, and sleep is easy and comforting and takes your mind off of things for a while.

 

I think really the only way to break out of it is with time - you gotta find a new purpose for your life, or a driving force, or remember what you had before and why you were motivated by it. Start a project, learn something new, do something you've always wanted to, find someone to love, that sort of stuff. Its kinda hard, but it really just takes time and the will to stick it out until you get to the next big milestone.

Edited by emsomniac (see edit history)

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