my own story for after the series preview

46 posts in this topic

Posted

i am making a story for after the zelda series i will be making a preview here in a few days

CidaShipiniZH likes this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

Uh, i doubt the LoZ series will be ending any time soon. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

well true but they wont make it to this time and ara

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

Do you mean to say you're making a zelda story that takes place after the events of the zelda universe?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

If you're doing a present-day/future Zelda, more power to you. A guy here wrote a present-day Zelda once and it was pretty neat.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

it will be to

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

THE LEGEND OF ZELDA THE DESCENDANTS



It a long time ago in hyrule when my grand father made the choice to be hero of
time now what does his great great great great great great grandson do hes the protector of the world!!!!
Ha ya right . Ms.Rimbiest . would laugh if i said that aloud i am a protector of
 the Rimbiest farm.And what that means is I keep it safe from Carptise.
carptice a huge hard skinned lizards with quills on its back and its tail. their
 eggs are rolled in dirt so you don't see them in a field to well . but my job is to search for the egg because
the are easier to kill when they are an egg.
when they hatch in a mater of hours the are hard as the parents and some how the parents find they kids back to protect them will they harden!


this is the first part in a few days i will put the next one signed Hevury

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

this is really difficult to read. You need to practice your grammar, spelling, and exposition.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

And once they harden we call in  a plain that sprays a chemical on them to soften  the shell then we hunt them down.my dad once said
",don't try  you will fail but if you do you will succeed,"that was 3 years before he died i am adopted by the Rimbiest family.
now i fight carptice and in my spare time make my hobby grow!
My hobby is inventing the quodrocoptor a special flyer that can reach a speed level i calculated would make time go backwards or forwards.
 if fast  enough i am afraid to try it tho because i don't know the out come of going thru the time wave would do to humans.I keep making calculations trying to find if it is safe but i can t make calculations on the past very easy.i want to try it but if i go back in time the present continues with out me till i get back witch was my biggest worry.
one day i noticed my blue prints for the motors were missing then a few weeks latter i found out all my blue  print were missing some one was going to try to go back thru time!
i was shocked when i found out!then some thing happened 3 days later  there were weird white spots on the ground people were falling thru! I went home to my shop hoped on the
quodrocoptor and started it it putted and roared then i noticed fizzing it had no cooling oil i used the reserve tank and took off flying hearing Ms.Rimbiest yelling because i left
in my head i thought ,"If i take to long the carptice will invade.i would mess time strips up if i went back to were i left and fought them.
so i couldn't.


well this will test my new grammar check!

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

Is english not your first language? I'd suggest getting an editor. iirc someone I know has one because english isn't their first language.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

Your story is brilliant. Please keep writing.

PrimaGaga, hevury and pheonix561 like this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

thank you i will i am making reel sketches of the quodrocoptor to :)


i only know English i just suck at grammer

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

Aah. If you are serious about this, I suggest improving your grammar and writing ability, even if you do so somewhere down the line. Your story idea is a pretty cool one, but it's readability would be a lot higher if the grammar were better.

Good luck with your story, man. c:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

Yeah honestly, i dont even know what your story is about. It's nearly impossible to read.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Posted

will any of you volunteer to correct it because my mind make me see it fine

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.