Arachne: Cashier, housemaid, therapist.

[Arachne 25]

Okay, here's the deal. It's been a week since I got back to my hometown. I finally get to be with my boyfriend for the first time since I left for school in January. It's awesome. But at the same time my mom just got out of the hospital from having a knee replacement, my aunt and grandparents have successively come and gone, helping my Mom with various things around the house. I helped out then, staining the fence, visiting, tidying up, that sort of thing.

Now however, with grandma and grandpa gone, I have to stay at mom's place to help her with various stuff, make sure she doesn't do anything that could hurt her knee, since she's still on crutches. No doubt over what to do there: I'll miss staying with my boyfriend, but it's necessary to stay until my mom's better. Jay's not taking it too well, though. Between working overtime (got my old job back, and the other cashier's on vacation) and staying the night at mom's place so I can help her in the mornings and evenings, it doesn't leave much time for him.

Usually both he and I go through our ups and downs, and we help each other get out of our various funks. But it seems like I'm almost always the one to deal with his depressed states. Last I heard from him, he hasn't eaten or slept since I moved some of my stuff into Mom's yesterday. It's a shame, since I was hoping he could pick me up from work and we could drive around for awhile today. He doesn't sound like he's fit to drive when he hasn't slept, though, and he's not answering his phone now.

I just worry that he's becoming too dependent on me for support, and I'm not enough to help him deal with the problems he's going through. Especially when I'm already working 50 hours a week, doing chores mornings and evenings for my mom, among other things.

Doing the overtime at the sushi place won't even guarantee that I'll get full-time hours afterwards and not have to get another job. I don't know whether I'll be living with mom for one and a half weeks or six weeks at this point, and Jay seems to take it as never getting to see me between now and when I leave, because my mom doesn't like him much and he's been trying to avoid her for that reason.

I just hate feeling like everyone's depending on me, and I hate how everything around me is so unstable.

[Mila 0]

You needed that. Look, everyone does have their problems and I understand unstable family life. What's really important, IMO, is to find a way to more or less help everyone. Example: keep up the work with your mom and your job. As for Jay, whenever you get a hold of him, tell him that it's not hte end of the world. You two will have plenty of time together. Work out times in between y'all schedules so you can optimism together time. That's all I can really think of. Hope it all works out ^-^

[Arachne 25]

Aww, thanks. I managed to have him pick me up after work, but he was miserable almost the entire 45 minutes we spent driving around. I don't think it has everything to do with me, but but not having me around is making his depression harder to bear. I managed to make him smile a couple times, just a little. If I can at least do that for him, hopefully I can do more tomorrow when I see him, either on my break or just after work.

[atlasmist radiofreak 0]

cripes maddy i'll be sure to catch you on skype and talk later

[Arachne 25]

Hey there, Atlas. I don't go on skype too often now, so I haven't talked to you in awhile.

Things are going better. Mom's putting her house on the market while she's still on crutches, too, so there's been some mad cleaning. Not much mind because my mom's such a neat freak. She got all upset with me today because the closet door fell off its tracks and the real estate agents were coming today (had to happen today right?). We got it back on its tracks and it was all good, but I think she's stressed out because she wants to do more than she's capable of. All she can see is the little things like the weeds in the garden that she hasn't pulled,how the pillows on the bed are arranged, etc.

I'm out of here for the next week, at least. She'll be out of town, and I shouldn't be here makinga mess anyways. So I get to stay with my bf again. In short, I finally get to get laid again.

[Mila 0]

There 'ya go, things are looking up