Cascade

I can confirm that I have snuggled with the whale. The belly rub has been indirectly passed to me. You can all cheer now. ;3
 
Blubberrubber or Poppasaurus for the whale's name?? AKA Team Nabe or Team Saha??

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

holy crap neighbours in this game can be so dickish sometimes
 
Right, so, one of my neighbours, adorable snow hamster Flurry was celebrating her birthday a few days ago. being my favourite out of my neighbours I turned up and gave her a COMPLETELY well thought-out, not last-minute-buy at all, present, a beautiful watermelon hat. Thinking, she likes fruit and she likes clothes surely she'll like it. And she SEEMED to like it at the time, even displayed it in her house and all.
 
but now... today... she brought it up in conversation...
 

 
she may be cute but she has literally no tact APPARENTLY ;-; i've never felt so betrayed by a virtual animal in my life. not so sure if I want to keep her in my town after this... ;-;

holy crap neighbours in this game can be so dickish sometimes
 
Right, so, one of my neighbours, adorable snow hamster Flurry was celebrating her birthday a few days ago. being my favourite out of my neighbours I turned up and gave her a COMPLETELY well thought-out, not last-minute-buy at all, present, a beautiful watermelon hat. Thinking, she likes fruit and she likes clothes surely she'll like it. And she SEEMED to like it at the time, even displayed it in her house and all.
 
but now... today... she brought it up in conversation...
 

 
she may be cute but she has literally no tact APPARENTLY ;-; i've never felt so betrayed by a virtual animal in my life. not so sure if I want to keep her in my town after this... ;-;

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

 

 
Don't think I'll be getting her best friend picture for a long time after this. But, pitfall is the only way to teach someone not to be such a blatant dick again. :V

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

To me, the pink whale is that wall, shoved near to me. Sometimes I think there's naught beyond. But 'tis enough. He tasks me; he heaps me; I see in him outrageous strength, with an inscrutable malice sinewing it. That inscrutable thing is chiefly what I hate; and be the pink whale agent, or be the pink whale principal, I will wreak that hate upon him. Talk not to me of blasphemy, man; I'd strike the sun if it insulted me. For could the sun do that, then could I do the other; since there is ever a sort of fair play herein, jealousy presiding over all creations. But not my master, man, is even that fair play. Who's over me? Truth hath no confines.

I bet she's having a whale of a time reading your puns

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

If I got something like that, I'd certainly be a blubbering mess.

That's whaley cool, cascade

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

I vote Poppasaurus. Blubberrubber only so it can be called Blub

pepposaurus*

totally Blubberrubber

My anime club's first meeting is today, I can ask people if they have names if you want
 
(i bet someone has an awesome name)
 
Also, did you remember to check...inside the whale?!?!?

I can confirm that I have snuggled with the whale. The belly rub has been indirectly passed to me. You can all cheer now. ;3
 
Blubberrubber or Poppasaurus for the whale's name?? AKA Team Nabe or Team Saha??

I can confirm that I have snuggled with the whale. The belly rub has been indirectly passed to me. You can all cheer now. ;3
 
Blubberrubber or Poppasaurus for the whale's name?? AKA Team Nabe or Team Saha??

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

The whale has the same expression that I imagine Pheo wears on his face at all times. Just a big ol' :B i'm a nerd :B :B 
 
HOLY puppy I FORGOT TO EVEN OPEN AND READ THE LETTER I WAS TOO DISTRACTED BY THE CUTENESS OF THIS WHALE. holy shit i will get on that asap

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the following photos have been edited. This is nothing but the complete TRUTH. All photos have been spoiler-tagged for your protection. Blame my lack of good cameras, I could not accurately record this event. Read ahead at your own risk.
 
So, today when I got back from an awful shift at work, a strange surprise was waiting for me at home. A bizarre package. There were so many ways in which it was bizarre. I didn't understand anything about what it was and why it was here. Let's look at it together:
 



 



 
Like I said, bizarre? Ignoring the fact that... someone... already attempted to open it, let's just count the ways it's bizarre:
Sadly my name isn't Sprinkles MacLollipop. It's only a lame, ugly name like Cascade. Someone must have confused me for their much sweeter friend. shame it IS a cute name I have never heard of a place called "Dekalb, Illinois". Where is that exactly? Nobody in all my interpersonal relationships lives or has travelled to such a place? Same with "USA". Isn't Stirling the only place around? This is just dumbfounding everything I have ever known. The sender/post office seriously have puppyed up here. Who on earth would have a name like "Ben Christianson"? Well lemme tell ya it ain't somebody I'd WILLINGLY associate with. Nor would anyone here be given such a terrible name. Again, what the puppy? Does this package say there's a stuffed toy in there? Did a five year old send this? I'm way too old for this stuff gosh. How did the sender manage to confuse their friend with me? ...How did he know my address? I would NEVER give out such personal information to STRANGERS. Clearly a dangerous person.  
Anyways, enough rambling. Since I don't know any Bens from imaginary places, I can't really send it back to them. And there ain't any Sprinkles around here, so delivering it to them is also out of the question. So, all I can do is open it and find out what the horrors lurking in it are, right? You're still with me, right? Good. 

...
 



 
There's... so much... PINK... I absolutely hate the colour pink... but sadly, I have to keep going to make sure it's awful and this Ben is not to be trusted.
 



 
It's....
 
This is...
 
It's... so... cute... Although I've always said I've preferred narwhals... but again, I don't know who this Ben is or who he thinks he is... sending me such a cute, pink whale plushie... he sounds like a right tool... idiot...
 



 
I don't think Sprinkles will miss this wee baby whale, do you? Naaaaahhh. What should I name my new pet, guys? Since you made it this far, it deserves to be named by all of you! :3
 



 
No, thank YOU, ben jammin'. I will treasure this whale always... the stranger danger whale... :3 Sometimes puppy-ups can be good things!
 
(probably one the dumbest threads I've ever created BUT. IN ALL SERIOUSNESS. PHEONIX561. Pheonix. Pheo. Ben. This is really awesome and you did not have to get and send me this awesome present just because I stupidly drunk called you one time two years ago and accidentally got charged £60+ for it. The joke's dead now but I gotta say it: you're a GOOD FRIEND. for serious. :> still a total NERD though. but some things will never change...)

Did you hug it, Cascade? Hug it close.